XENA LIMERICKS ‘99
When the Warrior Princess met Herc,
she first thought him a Goody-good jerk,
But the Gauntlet it taught her,
an important factor,
in her evil heart Goodness did lurk.
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Xena went out to be the big hero,
But saw sadness each day in the mirro,
Without something you see,
To keep her on key,
She quick found she amounted to zero.
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But her salvation one day just came,
And Gabrielle was her sweet name,
And her innocent love,
Gave the hero a shove,
And got Xena back into the game.
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When Xena met Gabby she saved her,
from husband and boredom and slaver,
And the Poteidaia bard,
Kept her warrior pard,
From the evil that Ares' wars gave her.
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To Auto Gab's said, "I'm not fickle,"
"But your mustache just makes a kiss
tickle,"
"Take your hand off my butt,
"I'm not that kind of slut,"
"To my Xena I'll always be faithful!"
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"Hey Gabby," said Xena one day,
"Lets ride off on Argo and play!"
But Gabby said "No,"
"I don't wanna go,"
"But I'll stay and kiss you if I may."
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Love Limerick in Three:
Gabrielle laid her head on Xe's shoulder,
Kissed her and touched her and told her,
"Xena, I love you,"
"Can't get enough of you,"
"You make my insides seem to
smoulder."
"Oh, my dear Gabrielle", Xena cried,
"For you I'll keep men from my side,"
and she bent her right over,
her sweet lips did rove her,
and they tossed then on passions sweet tide.
Now they'd finally shut down their alarms,
Found the sweetness of each other's charms,
Now asleep by the fire,
Each had found their desire,
The sweet comfort in each other's arms.
The End
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Now Callisto and Caesar both wanted,
to kill Gabby and Xena and plotted.
The girls went to the cross,
paid a terrible cost,
but they'll be back next year both undaunted.
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"So who's your true love?" said
god-Cupid,
"It's Xena," said Gabs, "Are you
stupid?"
"Be careful young thing,
don't insult the love king,
or to pop I'll make sure you're too
poopid!"
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Three Part Argo...
Thought Argo as squeals from above.
indicated two people in love,
"Stop all that mad bouncing,
that's my back you're jouncing,
Dammit, I said that's e-nuv!"
When she bucked them both into the air,
neither Xena nor Gabs gave a care,
when they landed kersplat!
they screamed "Keep doing that!"
for the sensation was indeed rare!
Now Argo crops grass in the field,
as armor and clothing is peeled,
among the sweet flowers,
they make love for hours,
As Gabby and Xe passions yield.
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"Oh, Xena, I love you, come here,"
"What is it, sweet Gabs?" Xena leers,
"Unlike Auto," Gab said,
as a grin crossed her head,
"I don't fear your dear hands on my
rear."
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"Hey, Gabs," Xena said, "wheres
the soap?
Are you sitting upon it, you dope?
Next time I swear,
before hot tubs we dare,
I'll elope with some soap on a rope."